The Nativity

The BBC put on a production called The Nativity which was about the aforementioned Nativity. It was a four-part program and was very interesting. Putting artistic license to one side it was very though provoking.
Mary was a young girl (said to be 16 in the film) and pledged to be married in a time when committing adultery would get you stoned to death and was very much frowned upon. Her & Joseph appeard to be happy, presumably having only met through her parents wishes, they talked, got on well with eachother and Joseph was mad about Mary. Mary was visited by the Angel Gabriel with the news she would have a baby but she was still a virgin. I think Mary was very brave to accept what was happening to her. She must've been very scared. How did she tell her parents, Joseph and her friends. It would surely be scary to be pregnant in our modern day but 2000 years it must have been a hellish time. The story goes from the visiting of the angel to Mary & Joseph travelling to Bethlehem with Mary being ready to give birth. There is nothing said about the in-between 9 months. What must have Mary thought? Did she doubt her ability to do this job. What about all those that didn't believe her. Did her parents believe her? It was quite a job to ask of Mary, to go through all the accusations and no-doubt name-calling, the scandal that the pregnancy would've caused. I've never thought about this side of the nativity. We tend to think of the infant nativity that our children perform in school, but it couldn't have been that nice. What did Joseph think. In the film, right up until the end (the birth) Joseph was racked with the pain of what he thought had happened. Mary's betrayal of him. He was a man of his word and as he said to Mary's parents he'd see that she was safely delivered to bethlehem. As Mary went into labour, Joseph couldn't watch and I sat there in pain for Mary having to go through the labour with a stranger and will Jospeh to 'see'. To go to Mary and comfort her. Right at the end he did and you know that his heart knowledge had finally travellled to his head.
I think it was very brave of the BBC to put this produciton on - certainly in times where christians cant be seen to be offending any other religion. It has made me think about the 9 months between the visit of the angel and the birth of Jesus and how brave both Mary & Joseph were in following God's plan.
If Mary hadn't off said yes to God would he have carried on anyway or would there have been a plan B?

Christmas is coming and the geese are getting fat (apparently)

It is 3 days till Christmas and as ever I am completely organised. I am not the type of person that has presents still left to wrap, presents to collect from the postal depot, still waiting for things off ebay (not majorly ruin your christmas things) and presents to collect from another part of the country whilst the roads are icy and snowy. Nope not me. Miss Organisation is my name. Haha
So there we are, everything I am not the type of person is really me. Oh dear. It happens every year. Although progress has been made in the planning dept. I stesarted putting some money aside for presents in October so I had a few pounds. Having said that I like the saving side and am going to continue it throughout the year. Whether I will ever be organised is something not to hold your breathe about.
I feel like I'm starting to wind down a bit now, school has finished and Hannah was fortunate enough to get two snow days extra as she wasn't due to finish till Tuesday this week but the weather put a stiop to school on Sunday night. I have only a shift on Christmas Eve and then will be off for 6 days (hopefully, have yet to see the rota). December has been busy, working, school nativities, Hannah's extra clubs that she goes to and I'm left feeling like when will I ever get on top of the house work. Washing is a continual mountain needing to be done, plus the hoovering and cleaning. Arrrghhhhh
I shall be glad of some rest. I'm not opting for extra hours at work till the schools get back into the swing of things as the kids have been farmed out enough in recent weeks.

Christmas - I am looking forward to seeing Hannah & Joshua's faces when they open up their big presents and see the look of delight when they realise what we have bought for them.
I have had a few presents from Pete already. He, sadly doesn't really do surprises and doesn't think he buys good presents but he does when he puts his mind to it. He's bought me some stuiff for running so in the new year I can really concentrate on my half marathon and a book on London so I can work out what to see & do when we go (hopefully half term).
Spending some family time with everyone.
Hannah got us to sing Happy Birthday to Jesus the other day on the walk back from work, so we'll have to do that on the day.
Resting, relaxing, quality family time. Woo hoo.

6 miles today

Untitled 11/23/10

My training route today. Gonna add a little more each week or so.

Marathon training continued

I went out for a run today. I thought I would go past my daughter's friends house to drop off what she had forgotten to take to school with her and then continue on my way. I wasn't sure where I was going to go but just kept running. I am more of a fair weather runner and have not kept on top of my fitness, as of late I haven't really been doing much running or exercising so as I was running along it seemed to get harder but I carried on regardless. Along a straight, long road. I had thought about this route a little but considering last week I only ran 3 miles I should've perhaps thought a little more about where I was going. It turned out to be a 10k run. Not bad considering how much I haven't run but I could tell that I have lost fitness (and put on weight) recently. If only I could bank it. I've done three hours exercise this week add that to my previous 2 hours and keep it so that in two weeks time when I've done no exercise I can just bring my fitness level back to where it was. I was 10 minutes over my personal best for that distance so a bit more running is needed. I just have to push myself to do it. I'm not a madly in love runner but more of a enjoy it once I get going, but have to motivate myself to do it kind of runner. Oh well, at least I can bank 1 1/2 hours of fitness levels.

Marathon training

Well Half-term is over so I have no excuse not to go out running. I think I am one of those unfortunate people who have to exercise in order to, at least, maintain my weight otherwise looking at food I seem to put weight on. It's quite depressing really getting on the scales only to discover the digits only move upwards not down so I have decided for the moment to relieve the scales of their job and use my clothes as a guide to whether I am putting on too much weight. So far so good.
Now that the kids are back in school I went running today - with cough and cold. I think there is a reason why your supposed to not exercise when not feeling 10% but still I went anyway. I decided to stop at work - not for a Big mac - to get my hours sorted for next and as i couldn't get them on the phone I thought I would run out that way. It was only a short run today which was good as I wasn't feeling great. I think also part of that is loss of fitness. Fitness is something that needs to be attained and cant be kept. We have to jeep working at it in order to maintain it. So having done not a lot of exercise in the past week or so I did rather feel it today. Still the training has started. 2.73 miles today, and some core muscles training at the end. Aerobics on Thursday which will be my cross-training and then hopefully get out on Sunday morning. Watch this space.....

Reading Half Marathon

Well as the title says, I have signed up for the Reading Half Marathon. It is on March 20th 2011. A great way to celebrate turning 34. When submitting the form you have to predict your finishing time so they can place you in the correct zone. I have gone for 2hrs 30 mins. I had a finishing time of 75 mins for my 10km race in June and the half marathon is double this. I realise that doesn't automatically mean I should double the time but seeing as I have never ran this distance before its a base to start from. Hopefully, with training I should be able to loose some more weight and therefore with carrying less weight should be able to go faster. I shall be looking into some training programs and eating plans etc to help me reach my challenge.
Went for a run today and did 4.85 miles and managed to shave off 2 minutes which doesn't seem a lot but it requires a lot of energy as you have to go slightly faster but for more longer periods of time.
Here's to training for the next 5 months.

God saw all that he had made, and it was very good.

In my Bible reading today the reading was taken from Genesis 1: 26-31 and 2: 18-25 where God created the world and saw that it was good. That includes me. Wow that is amazing. I have struggled for years with self-doubt about the way I look and whether I'm good at stuff. I see talented people doing things and just wish I could be that good, for example the worship team at church is awesome but I just don't think I could be that good and I know that I would struggle with it. I wish I was slimmer or prettier but its all MY opinion. I haven't done any bible reading notes for a few days but today picked up the notes and bible and read this verse
"God saw all that he had made, and it was very good"
We've been doing a series on the Orphan spirit at church in the last few weeks and it's about replacing our orphan spirit - one that says I'm not good enough - with a God spirit that says 'you are my son/daughter' 'an heir' and the bible reading notes for this month are all about the orphan spirit. Last week a situation at home came to a head and after setting of for church I came back before even getting there and just really felt like there no point in going because what would God want with someone like me.
Perhaps God is trying to speak to me. Maybe (just maybe) I might start listening.
Lets see what else He has to say over this next month.

New beginnings - growing up

September is often seen as a new year aas its the start of the new school term and activities start up again after the summer break. Kids go back to school in a new class and they have all gotten a year older. Hannah is now in Year 1 and I think we will start seeing how big a step up year 1 is compared to reception as she starts to get homework sent home as of Monday and spellings after half term.
The kids have spent all their lives sleeping in the same bedroom but for the past 6 months I have wanted to separate them and it has finally happenend. Joshua has his own bedroom and has settled well to sleeping in a big boy bed and on his own. He also started pre-school on thursday and received his first 'tificate for completing his 1st day. he is just so grown-up now, its hard to remember to let them do things for themselves. I keep doing things for them when they can do it themselves. The plus side is that I now get 3 mornings a week to myself for ME time. Aerobics, swimming, I may even get the ol' clarinet out and have a blow. Oohhh the excitement. I have two children becoming more independant - it must be time for another little one!!!!

For I know the plans I have for you

I have been finding that difficult to believe of late. I wish God would tell us and tell other poeple who make the decisions cos it feels like no one is getting the message. Its all to do with Pete getting a job, since merging the business with someone else we have struggled financially and Pete has struggled to have a stable job - being made redundant several times. Now he is self-employed and so we struggle with the uncertainty of when and if pete is going to get work for the day. He has had job interviews which we thought he stood a good chance of getting but to no avail. Applied for so many and been turned down or not even short listed. So its no wonder that I struggle to believe the verse "For I know the plans I have for you", i wish it would say after "and I will tell all the appropriate people what they are - the ones who decide on jobs and you which job to apply for"
I have increased my hours at work - for what its worth - so work on the weekends but I just wish we could sell up and get rid of all our debts and start again. I dont know if anyone reads this but if you do please pray for us and our situation.

Today was the Women's Conforence - Free to be - @ Church today. It has been an emotional up & down kind of day. Bringing up loads of things for me to think about/work through. How I feel about myself, my valuation of myself. I know it in my head, the theroy but but in practise it is so much harder to feel worth. To look at myself in the mirror and not think how ugly are you. It is harder to feel that I'm not an irritation and a burden to the people around me. I dont want Hannah to struggle with these issues yet how can I teach her to have confidence in herself both physically, mentally & emotionally when I dont have any in myself. I know that I shouldn't think on these things and that its not Godly to think these things but sometimes it just comes out of my mouth. I dont want to be speaking these things in my house as it wont help Hannah to grow up with a healthy sense of worth. I know I need to spend more quality time with her, to learn about her and get to know her better. I know I need to get back to the basics and put God into the centre of it all.

Wow - its been a while

Well as the title says it been a while since I was last on here. What has happened since August 09. Well Hannah started school, she has settled in well and is making huge leaps in her learning. I love the fact that she can write her own name, knows lots of letters from the alphabet, numeracy skills etc. She was an angel in the christmas nativity. She has been planning her party since like October which makes me laugh. Pete got a job working for one of his old bosses. He has now qualified as an Emergency Transport Attendant which means he can work on the ambulances (not as a paramedic) so does shifts every so often when they come up. Joshua started at play school one afternoon a week and will soon go to two afternoons. I am still working at McDonalds but have moved to a store closer by which I enjoy. We moved church at the end of the year which has been hard leaving everything familiar behind. I still see friends from the old church so it hasn't been a major issue but its still sad, on the positive Pete & I are enjoying our new church and it seems to have brought a bit more fire to my faith. I have recently been thinking about joining the worship team which will be a big challenge as they are of a higher standard than I am used or feel qualified to play in. I probably wont be able to do anything until sometime in May. I had my metal plate removed from my wrist a couple of weeks ago which at the moment seems to have been an improvement. Well yesterday was my birthday, 33 years old. It was a much happier day than last year. I went to work doing shortened hours and then came home and made some pizzas and had friends round to share it with. Tonight I am going out with my sister to the community cinema to see the film Up, and then go out for a drink. Tomorrow we are going out for a carvery meal which I am looking forward to.
Last year in June I was very drepressed about my weight which seemed to be going only one way and that was up. I went to see a friend of mine and asked her to be my weight loss mentor. After going through a food diary and giving me some pointers on where I was going wrong, I lost 3lb in 2 days. I have continued to loss weight and gain fitness and over the past9 months have lost 31 1/2lb. I am only a few pounds away from having lost 20% of my body weight. I still have more weight to lose, but dont particluary have a goal in mind, although to get into the healthy weight BMI scale I need to get down to 9st 6lb as a minimum. Still have a way to go. I have entered the Race for Life 10k race at Cheltenham racecourse in July. I have discovered a joy of exercise which I didn't have before.
Life, at the moment, seems to be okay.